51.2025

Busy couple of days thanks to a work event, which meant I couldn't brood about the world around me for a bit. So that was a nice break.

Then I log back in today and see literal Nazis trying to take control again and I have to remind myself that once upon a time, the party that voted in the Nazis used to be the party that was proud to punch them in the face. The world is upside down and on fire and people laugh at you for caring.

So I'm trying to be focused on my family and my community. I don't have the bandwidth to fight the bigger fight, but I will support those who can. I will do what I can from my corner of nowhere but I also need to put my oxygen mask on first.

Anyway.

It's amazing that I'm still managing to fight the temptations to stress shop. I did to some severe window shopping last night but it was just research and I walked myself off the ledge and no monies were exchanged.

Then this morning I filed my taxes and paid the $2 I owed to the feds (which tells me my current tax estimate is good enough). I hope it goes to supporting federal workers in their important roles at their respective agencies and not the pockets of billionaires who don't need my extra dollars.

(Again, why is this even a thing that is happening????)

I feel like joking that this was a great year to get serious about a No Buy Year like someone may joke about being a great year to quit drinking. And yes, I did try to start it last year-ish. But I feel like I will always be the hamster in the No Buy Year treadmill because will I ever learn my saving muscles? Can I avoid the dopamine hit of getting something Shiny?

Or perhaps having the government decide that my desire to collect Shinies (and thus remain part of the capitalist structure because of constant consuming) means that I need to be sent to work camps to prove that I am worthwhile.

My accidentally stocking up on ADHD meds because I literally forget to take them may end up being a good thing, I guess. (And seriously, anyone who thinks people with ADHD are addicted to the medication that can make them function on a more normie level is also in need of psychiatric care. I am not addicted to something I struggle to remember to take regularly!)

To be honest, I'm sometimes surprised I'm functioning at all these last few days because I'm a smart cookie who has studied history and can recognize patterns and knows propaganda lies when she sees them. And all of this (gestures wildly) is so obvious to anyone with half a brain, but if that's the case, then most of America is seriously lacking in the brain department.

Speaking of brains, Severance is getting me through the week, waiting for each new episode and then speculating through the next week until the new episode airs. I never thought I'd be so thankful for Ben Stiller, but 2025 has shown us that anything can happen.

(This was more of a personal journal entry vent but whatever. The psychology behind a No Buy is just as important as tracking spending.)